SLOW FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Plus a poem by David Whyte, Purpose Anxiety by Liz Gilbert, 5 things worth sharing, and more.
Hello, Friends:
Sometimes It’s hard to comprehend how much life we live in a single week.
Truth be told, it was such a full week and I feel much like my computer with far too many tabs open and the battery running a smidge low.
The week held difficult news from friends facing health struggles - accidents, surgeries, cancer diagnoses, and more. It reminds me of times when my good friend Daniel used to stop by our house, open the fridge in search of some elusive dish that he never seemed to be able to find, and sigh out, “Life… it’s just so daily.”
But there was good news, too. I was accepted as a volunteer for an organization I admire and Ron and I made the decision to take a trip this spring to celebrate - gulp, are you ready? - our 40th wedding anniversary which is in April.
In the midst of this week crammed with introspection, insecurities, and inspiration, one of the best things I did for myself was to take a day off. I took the entirety of Wednesday to do nothing. Or better said, I took the day to move more slowly, paddling around the house in comfy sweats and slippers, spending very little time with screens ( other than reading recipes), and puttering in the kitchen making nourishing meals for the week, because that’s what felt nourishing to me.
I read a little. I walked a bit. I listened to some music but mostly spent time in quiet. I gazed out my front window at the bare trees and white sky. I followed my instincts, moment to moment, and spent the day in gentle activities, rest, and ease. No agenda. No figuring things out. I’ve got to tell you, it was absolutely the best gift I could give myself.
As we ease into this new year that doesn’t actually feel like a new year yet, I am focusing on ease, gentleness, and rest. Rest is a crucial ingredient to our well-being and to any life well lived.
I remind myself yet again that my life is not a race nor a contest to be won and that while I long for a recipe that will make everything simple, straightforward and clear, there isn’t a formula for what I yearn for most deeply. There is only a willingness, a letting go, sincere trust, and the courage to persevere.
Thankfully, there are also trusted guides. Those with a lot more time in the KITCHEN. Those who use only the most transformational ingredients. The poets, the healers, the mystics, the lovers, the artists, and the seekers. Those who help me play in the cosmic kitchen.
As I sat down to write today, I thought to myself, how will I pull together all the diverse resources and experiences from the week and serve them up in a dish that nourishes you? How do I pull from the deep richness of my Sunday sessions with poet David Whyte, teaching videos of Jim Finley, my group discussions, and calls from the week?
I don’t think I have an answer, but…
…the pot is still simmering over a warm fire. I am not sure what this stew will be or if it is even finished cooking. But the ingredients have been rich this week, and the aroma is enticing. It makes your shoulders relax and your belly soften.
In the meantime, if you want to draw near my little stovetop, I will share some of my explorations this week and you can decide for yourself what ingredients if any, appeal to you.
xo Mary
5 THINGS WORTH SHARING:
PURPOSE ANXIETY. For those struggling with what is yours to do and never feel you are doing it. Here’s a great take on why you might feel that way. From author Liz Gilbert in an interview with Katie Bowler. ( You can watch or listen here.)
“ There is a pathological obsession and I don't use the word pathological lightly here, in this country, with making sure that your life has a higher purpose than just having a life, which is already pretty incredible. Like just having a life is already pretty amazing but that's not good enough. It has to be a purposeful life. So this is the formula that we've all been fed. And we've been fed it our entire lives. You've heard it in every commencement speech. You've heard it in every inspirational speech and it's each of you is born with a special gift. Each of you has one unique offering. That's why you were sent here to find what that is. The one thing that you can do that literally nobody else can do. It's your job in life, your purpose to uncover what that thing is and then once you find it, you must foster it, and master it and curate it until you're at the top of that thing that only you can do. And then you must monetize it. Because if you don't monetize it, you're not really successful at it. It's just a hobby. So you must monetize it, but it's not enough to monetize it and be very successful at it. You must be an opportunity creator for other people within this purpose that you created so that you bring other people who uplift other people with your purpose, and it's not enough that you uplift other people and you monetize it and you must leave a legacy. You must leave a legacy. When you are gone, generations after, the world is a changed place because you were here. No pressure. But that is literally what you have been taught. Am I wrong? So everybody that I know is struggling from so much purpose anxiety... that they can't live. And what if that's totally wrong? No one ever questions it, but what if that's totally wrong? I have literally no idea what my purpose is. I don't know.”
The best cure for purpose anxiety? Practices that help you slow the mind. Centering Prayer or meditation, a long walk focusing on your surroundings, an activity that absorbs your attention fully. Taking a day to do nothing. A good poem like the one below. Turn sideways into the light. Slow down the racing thoughts and disappear into what David Whyte calls “the originality of it all” and our “palms turn out to take in the blessing of the world.”
TOBAR PHADRAIC by David Whyte
Turn sideways into the light as they say
the old ones did and disappear
into the originality of it all.
Be impatient with easy explanations
and teach that part of the mind
that wants to know everything
not to begin questions it cannot answer.
Walk the green road above the bay
and the low glinting fields
toward the evening sun, let that Atlantic
gleam be ahead of you and the gray light
of the bay below you, until you catch,
down on your left, the break in the wall,
for just above in the shadows
you’ll find it hidden, a curved arm
of rock holding the water close to the mountain,
a just-lit surface smoothing a scattering of coins,
and in the niche above, notes to the dead
and supplications for those who still live
But for now, you are alone with the transfiguration
and ask no healing for your own
but look down as if looking through time,
as if through a rent veil from the other
side of the question you’ve refused to ask.
And you remember now, that clear stream
of generosity from which you drank,
how as a child your arms could rise and your palms
turn out to take the blessing of the world.
INSTEAD OF “WHAT’S NEXT?,” ASK “WHAT’S NOW?”
From a conversation with my friend, Judy:
What if instead of always rushing, fretting, and wondering what’s next?” we instead turned our focus to what and who is right in front of us? “ What if instead, we ask, “What’s Now? “
OUR HEALING HELPS HEAL THE WORLD
From a conversation with my friend, Ghazal:
I'm feeling that the rhythm and feel of my healing path are not separate from the healing of the world. What needs to happen in my personal journey is also what the world needs.” - Ghazal
Any step we take towards our own healing helps to heal the world. Can you feel that?
I AM NOT OTHER
Although I am not God, I am not other than God. Although I am not you, I am not other than you."— James Finley.
"Your own presence in the midst of your pain bears witness to a presence that transcends your pain and sustains you in it unexplainably. And I think this is handing our lives over." — James Finley
I am currently enrolled in his course on Mystical Sobriety. This man offers me more intimate soul medicine in five minutes than I could read in a month. You can find his course here. His next session begins in April.
A SPECIAL REQUEST THIS WEEK
If you can help:
PLEASE DONATE HERE: to help with Medical and Care Expenses for Paul
My very dear “daughter from another mother” and her husband and baby are going through an incredibly difficult time. Here’s an excerpt from their GO FUND ME campaign:
“On December 26, 2022, Paul was in a bad motorcycle accident in Austin, TX. While on a highway bridge with no shoulder, a careless truck dropped a sofa onto the roadway from its unsecured truck bed. The cars between Paul and the truck had little room to swerve to avoid hitting the couch on the road. The car directly ahead of Paul hit the barrier and spun into the road, striking Paul. When it came to a stop, Paul was pinned under the car. Thankfully, several people immediately came to his aid and worked together to lift the car off of him. EMS arrived soon on the scene, and STAR Flight soon thereafter. Witnesses helping Paul said that the driver of the white truck carrying the couch had pulled over and had even gotten out of the car to come back to the other vehicles, but that when he saw that there was someone injured, he ran back to his truck and drove off.
Paul suffered: two collapsed lungs and was on a ventilator for two days; a fractured clavicle; 10 fractured ribs along his sternum; two fractures in his pelvis; a shattered/fractured T12 vertebrae that required a spinal fusion surgery; and he is currently paralyzed below the waist… “ CLICK HERE TO CONTINUE READING AND TO DONATE.
ANY AND EVERY DONATION HELPS.
Thank you so much from my heart to yours. xo Mary
Lastly, we are just a few days away from the Contemplative Prayer Summit this weekend - Jan 21-22, 2023.
Hosted by my friends Keith Kristich and Jana Rentzel, this program features speakers like Cynthia Bourgeault, Adam Bucko, Mary Dwyer, Phileena Nikole and others. Eight speakers over a two-day period, and if you can’t attend all of it as it is live-streamed, you can access the recordings at a later date. REGISTER THROUGH THIS LINK and join me.
This month I will be donating a portion of my paid subscriptions to:
ATV /Alternative To Violence, Loveland. Alternatives to Violence provides shelter, advocacy, education and resources for people impacted by domestic violence, sexual assault, and human trafficking.
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Nourished. Thank you! ❤️